Hippo's Trip to Rome

Text: Eric Cochrane

Photos: Elizabeth Fama

Many people take pictures of their families when they go on trips and then post them on the Internet. These people are wasting film, time, and Internet (it's finite, you bastards!). Since our family is neither photogenic nor able to stand still for more than a few seconds, we instead took pictures of Hippo's adventures in Rome. We made many friends trying to get Hippo onto ancient ruins and next to priceless works of art. Enjoy!

This was Hippo's first stop. The Basilica of St. Peter. She'll return here later in the trip. The shot on the right is of Vatican city. But apparently it's an entire country devoted to the Pope, which raises the question, "Why the hell doesn't Hippo have a country?"

These are pictures of Hippo in and next to the Colosseum. Her foot is bandaged because she had just been run over by a car. I'm not naming names, but Mama dropped her in the middle of the street where a crazy Italian driver commited a hit-and-run attempted homocide (hippocide?). If Mama hadn't thrown herself in front of the on-coming trafic in a desperate attempt to save Hippo, Hippo wouldn't have come out as relatively unharmed as she did. I'll tell you, watching that hippo being run over was one of my more scarring memories.

Here's Hippo pretending to be a bust in a park she found.

And here's our favorite hippo in front of the Arch of Constantine. We don't have any pictures of the Arch in focus. Even cameras think Hippo is important!

This is Hippo in front of the Fountain of the Four Rivers, but, as she pointed out, "The river is actually a naked man." Well Hippo, to Romans, everything is naked men.

Here are two pictures of Hippo with the Pope. They were knighting bishops or something when we tried to enter St. Peter's, so we had to make do with getting shots of Hippo and her friend Benedict. This is actually the closest Hippo is legally alowed to be to popes ever since her "incident".

And what would a trip to Rome be without good food? Hippo's hobby was raiding restaurants for half-eaten pasta.

Well, those are the pictures of Hippo in Rome. If you liked them, check out her trip to Florence.